I'm so Pamela Anderson and I don't Even Know It

I used to say that I could NEVER be a vegetarian. This was because my family farms. My great-great-great grandfather plowed fertile Kansas soil, raised hogs and cattle and now the land has been passed down to my uncle. So therefore, it would be a slap in the face to my ansetory to deny myself some grass fed USDA filet mignon. Am I right?

If you remember, a few years ago my aunt left my uncle and her four children for the hired man. There was much drama. A threat of abuse. A restraining order. A few appearances in the local paper and much gossip around the beauty salon. Their separation left everyone scratching their heads and drinking their beers and in general, trying forget it ever happened. A pesky thing to do when you have four kids.

Long story short, my loyalty to meat has also splintered. I think it was one part Skinny Bitch, one part California, a little too much time on the PETA website and a dash of curiosity.

And a few months into it, I'm here to report that we're all surviving! We eat a lot of veggie burgers. We make pizza with whole wheat crust and soy cheese. This morning, I asked Lula if she liked facon and she enthusiastically replied "yeah, but I like real bacon better." I used to think that it would be too expensive to go veg, but I really haven't noticed an increase at the grocery store. Honest.

Now, just as I start to get all smug, and think OMG, we're really vegans. I'll remember something like the turkey meatloaf or the turkey meatballs. We eat fish. (And apparently turkey.) Then there's the occasional glass of milk. But there is so much more fruit and vegetables in our diet. I never thought I'd actually attempt to make a mashed potato like substance out of whipped cauliflower. I also never thought I'd listen to Kid Rock on the treadmill, but I do that too. I don't mean to offend anyone, I know the definition of a true vegan. I'm just saying, it's steps in the right direction. Tattooed, road-hard, big smiling steps.