Thursday, August 7, 2008

Joel Osteen's Wife Gave Me Hemorrhoids

I'm not going to lie to you, it was a tough day.

Before I walked out the door at 6 am, I used Erik's cell to call mine to make sure I had my phone before I left the house. Smart, huh? I dialed "Mom Cell" two times. (Yeah, Erik and I do that OBNOXIOUS thing where we call each other Mom and Dad.) And I wondered why it wasn't ringing or vibrating or - Oh, there it is. And I didn't even connect the dots when my cell aka "Mom Cell" called Erik back. I thought that I was accidentally pushing buttons not that I'd called Erik's mom twice before 6 am. Daughter-in-law of the year.

Took a cab from the bus station to Fort Mason. It was 5x what I had estimated the cost to be. Somehow I think my "dollar a mile" algorithm might be flawed.

Conference was cool. Wish I could have stayed for more. Especially the more that included the beer.

Drove 40 miles (80 miles roundtrip) to a job interview all afternoon. Hate freeways. Hate traffic. Would never see the girls. Still feel pressure to consider the offer in this economy.

Erik had Stress in The City. We're both adjusting to the sights of San Francisco. Our girls have a grasp on homelessness not so much on transexuals. It's just going to take some time to adjust. If we were fish, we'd still be swimming inside the plastic bag.

I'm tired. Lula brought her rug into the living room and is begging me to roll her up like a burrito. Would I be terrible if I leave her rolled up like that?

Oh, the Joel Osteen wifey nod. Wowzer. I'm mesmerized.


Denise said...

Good luck with the job search! How fun to be in SF!

So, do you think Victoria Olsteen did it?

Miss Grace said...

Ugh I HATE driving AND freeways AND commutes. UGH.

zellmer said...

"If we were fish, we'd still be swimming inside the plastic bag."

I love this line. I might have to add it to my "favorite lines" side bar, making you the only person with 2 quotes.

Here's the weather forecast in Austin this week:

Friday: 102
Saturday: 101
Sunday: 100
Monday: 101
Tuesday: 101
Wednesday: 100
Thursday: 101


'That Girl' said...

Who is Joel Olsteen's wife? what'd she do?

I'm off to google.

Also, I'm so WITH YOU on the American woman song! It's always rubbed me the wrong way. Who the hell does he think he IS!?

Jen said...

Hahaha! Joel Olsteen's wife doesn't give me 'roids...she gives me the creeps.

Hope your day is better today mama.

Now go roll that baby up like a burrito.

jorg gray said...

Hemorrhoids may be located inside the rectum (internal hemorrhoids), or they may develop under the skin around the anus (external hemorrhoids top medical sites).

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