Sunday, February 24, 2008

What's 5 years among friends

I get a certain amount of grief for working outside the home. The other day, it was delivered with a sucker punch to the gut. Hazel lamented the fate of her good friend, let's call her Kate.

"Kate's mom retired when Kate was born!" Hazel exclaimed as the main argument for her ten zillionth request to be picked up as soon as school was out.

She kept it up, "Kate gets to go to more activities and experiences than I do because her mom retired."

My mind raced with how to answer, how to explain. My first thought: Well, Kate's daddy makes a lot more money than our daddy...was a quick pass. I knew that - well I have no idea how much money he makes, and how would that teach her any thing or sooth her in any way?

I tried to deliver the not so obvious. That I enjoy my job. That I have a successful career. That when she grows up to be a clothing designer/artist/gallery owner/veterinarian I hope she finds as much joy as I have shilling soda water to the masses.

I think we both sensed a certain amount of BS in that statement. So as my mind raced, I grasped for an explanation and blurted out the third thing that came to mind.

"Well, honey, Kate's mom is a lot older than I am."

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

What would you have done?

5 comments:

zellmer said...

Oh, what a hard thing to have to answer. It's no fair that we get guilted on all sides to do the opposite of what we feel is right. You handled it like a champ, as always.

Which Box said...

I DREAD hearing this some day, because despite the fact that I know I am not cut out to be a stay at home mom, I am still ambivalent about working, and with yeah, a great deal of adjustments (and a happy, stable marriage) I could be a stay at home mom. Except I would be a terrible stay at home mom. Terrible.

I think you handled it as well as you could have, all things considered. There is no right answer sometimes.

I am interested in hearing more about your work life balance struggles, cause I struggle on a regular basis.

I do have stat counter installed. I hover around 40 or so unique visitors a day. I used to spend time on Technorati - my blog is like ranked in the 1.6 Million. Dooce is like in the top 50 of all blogs. Amalah is top 500.

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