Monday, December 17, 2007

There's an ogre among us.

I realized something this weekend. Maybe you should sit down, this is going to be profound.  I realized I am projecting my feelings about the certain kindergartner's teacher on to the certain kindergartner.

This past weekend, Lula was talking when suddenly she exclaimed: Mommy! When are you going to get it through your thick head.....?!?!

I was too taken aback to remember what I should be getting through my thick head. Immediately, Erik banished her to her room with a firm: Do NOT speak to your mother that way, young lady! Her head is like her body. You hear me? Very, very thin!

But all I could wonder, was - where does she get that from?! And my Nancy Drew instincts kicked in. A classroom brimming with 5 year-olds, that's where. The smoking gun MUST be the Kindergarten teacher!!

Later, I went to talk to Lula about where she had heard about cranium density when I noticed a bruise on my sweet baby child. A circular contusion. It looked suspiciously like a thumb print. The kind you might get if, perhaps, a certain Kindergarten teacher squeezed your arm a too hard in a fit of frustration from having an insane about of students in one classroom who were all attempting to navigate full day of school away from home, many for the first time. Dun. Dun. Dunnnnnnnnn!

Lula, I inquired, where did you hear that? Who told you: Why can't you get it through your thick head?

To which she politely explained: I heard it on Shrek The Halls.

I am currently taking on a few more P.I. cases, should you desire my services. 




8 comments:

Beau said...

A natural love for Shrek doesn't explain the bruise! Unless Eddie Murphy gave it to her... which would also make sense.

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