Am I doing okay? started innocently enough.
To fully understand, you'll need a bit of history. My Beaufriend started about two weeks after me at my old job. It was his first job, so he was naive and scared. I, on the other hand, was seasoned and jaded. The story goes that his first impression of me was one of awe and wonder because I possessed a vast knowledge of all thing advertising and the ability to project (a false sense of) confidence! What fun!
It was on his third day that he overheard me exclaim to the co-worker in the next cube, "Am I doing okay?"
And that is when my cover was blown. My whole life I have always looked for reassurance that what ever I am doing, I am doing well. I think that it probably one reason I picked a career that is very much like school. We get assignments. We have deadlines. We get feedback. In many ways, advertising award shows are like report cards. Well, more like a Who's Who of American High Schools.
I'm always critiquing myself. Questioning if indeed, I am doing okay. And on this day. The first day of November. The day after Halloween. I am here to tell you I am NOT doing okay.