Thursday, September 27, 2007

Sex, Lies and Soccer Games

Yesterday was the area high school's Homecoming parade. The girlscouts had a small float. I sat with three other mommies on the back of an SUV pulling a small trailer, aka the float. There was cheering. There was candy throwing. And there was picture taking. It was all followed by a $5 fundraising hamburger,chips, drink and cookie meal. Later, as I was tucking the girls in to bed, I heard my phone ringing in the other room. When I checked the message it was the mom who had driven the SUV/float saying she had my camera. After a quick mental review, I realized I not only left the digital camera in the back of her car but also the video camera. When I called her back, she explained that isn't it great now with digital technology, you can just look at the pictures and video to find out who lost their camera? Which made my mind do a few twists trying to remember what exactly IS on the video camera. To the best of my recollection, there is: the girls swimming, the girls at cheer camp, the girls in the cold tub, the girls on the trampoline, the girls in Galveston, the girls, the girls and more of the girls. I mentioned it to Erik later. The what if? What if that mommy just decided to try to find out who left the camera in her car and instead of 2-4-6-8 from cheer camp she got a little mommy / daddy 69? Wouldn't that get the PTA talking?

Monday, September 24, 2007

Her Father's Daughter

Hazel looks like Erik. Occasionally, people will say we look alike. But I know better. Erik says watching Hazel is like looking in a mirror. Tonight, Hazel and I were chatting about the prospects of tomorrow's lunch. After eating with them for the first time at their school last Thursday, I can't wait to go back. My plan was to go on a day when they are planning to eat school lunch and observe. I am curious about the choices they make when they go through the cafeteria line. Last Thursday, Lauren's mom was there to eat with Lauren and she brought food from Arby's. And across the room their was another mom with a Chik-fil-a bag. So forgetting my whole plan to make sure they are at least asking for the fruit and vegetable option, I asked Hazel where she wanted me to pick up the lunch. Immediately her arm shot up in the air. She waved her hand wildly and proclaimed, "I know! I know! HOOTERS!!!"

Friday, September 21, 2007

I'm like a bird

Guess what? Mamma got fired. Lovely, eh? I HATED my job. And I have gotten over the sting in record breaking time. I am so full of excitement at the possibility of what is next for me. And so incredibly thankful it is not an employee of my former boss. I was working in a department of 15 people, three were women, three were parents. One parent was a woman. Me. I think being a mother AND being a woman had everything to do with why I no longer have gainfull employment.

Since my release I have busied myself by:

Having lunch with my children at school.
Taking my daughter to her ballet lessons and arriving on time.
Going to the zoo with other moms student holiday.
Getting my hair cut.

Monday, I am so going to a movie. And I really, really hope I don't have to fire the cleaning lady. Tomorrow is only her 2nd day on the job.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Over the shoulder pebble holders?

The first time Hazel asked for a bra, I just ignored her. It is a common coping mechanism I use. Be still and maybe it will go away. Which it did, until Saturday when I could not BELIEVE the racks and racks and racks of children's bras. And what is even more jaw dropping – they were padded! As Hazel glanced up at all of them wide-eyed she exclaimed, "Oh, this one is pretty. This one is pretty. Oh, I like this one". I tried to imagine a six year old wearing a padded bra. It was a pandora's box of problems. And it was easy for me to say absolutely NOT!

But the bra door had been opened again. I had discussed this dilemma with my cousin April the first time around. She has two daughters, one being many years older than my two. Her solve was a sports bra style bra, similar to a tank top but shorter. And because I don't want to make my girls feel weird about their bodies or create a situation where they want something twice as bad just because Mom said "NO", I bought four Champion® extra small sports bras in pink, lavender, light blue and turquoise. Two for each the girl.

You know when they reveal the gift new car on My Super Sweet 16? The shrieks of joy. The trills of happiness. Over the moon they were. And for the rest of the weekend is was non-stop bra talk. Can you sleep in a bra? Do you like my bra? Can I switch to the other bra? Can I just wear the bra with these pants? I'm going to wear my bra to dinner. To church. To school. To the park. To walk the dog. On and on.

It is Tuesday and both girls are braless at school today. Monday I warned Hazel's best friend's mom. I knew that her daughter would be begging for a bra, just as mine is begging for the things Lauren has that she doesn't. She isn't ready for Lauren to wear a bra. Who is? Apparently children's clothing manufacturers.

*I was looking for an image for this post, so I googled child bra. I clicked on the first non-sponsored link and discovered that I have NOT seen pictures of normal non-sexual breasts.

Monday, September 17, 2007

Gimme a C - U - T- E !!!

We arrived home from Austin last night late. I carried one sleeping kid in and instructed the other to use the bathroom before going straight to bed. We are just about out of the "accident" phase of parenting and really I can't congratulate myself enough. This example of accident refers to the pee pee variety. In case you are no where near or forgotten all the messy details, you can take a sleeping child and sit them on the potty and nine times out of ten, they will tinkle. Amazing. After checking to make sure all the pets were still alive, I thumbed through the mail and then opened the free supplemental weekend section we get to the paper. The funny thing is, this particular paper is usually delivered on Sunday night, making all the news obsolete. But I still read it, occasionally I find something interesting and they often have a coupon for a free medium popcorn at the Angelika movie theatre. I fantasize about going to the movies again someday, but since I no longer live across the street from the busiest theatre in North America and I have about 22 minutes of unaccounted for time per day, it is mostly an exercise in the scissor skills and cutting on the line. Plus, seeing the coupon carefully cut out and tucked in the pocket like a possibility makes me smile when I am digging through my wallet for the appropriate member card at various retail establishments. I open the weekend section of the paper. Scan through the headlines and my eye catches on a front-page photo. Is that? My kid is front-page news! You didn't know I was raising a french horn aficionado? No the cheerleader on the right. Hopelessly out of sync with the rest of the squad, with her tongue outstretched a little less than her arms. That one is mine! And I'd like to thank whoever told the photographer and incorrectly credited her older sister. Now I don't have to come up with a creative answer to why does Lula get to be in the paper and I don't?